Sunday School Bloopers
These sentences were written by Catholic school kids. They are answers to questions about the Bible—typos and Freudian slips included.
“Lot’s wife was a pillar of salt during the day, but a ball of fire during the night.”
“The Jews were a proud people and throughout history they had trouble with unsympathetic genitals.”
“Sampson was a strongman who let himself be led astray by a Jezebel like Delilah.”
“Moses led the Jews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread, which is bread without any ingredients.”
“The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.”
“The seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.”
“The greatest miracle in the bible is when Joshua told his son to stand still and he obeyed him.”
“David was a Hebrew king who was skilled at playing the liar. He fought the Finkelsteins, a race of people who lived in biblical times.”
“Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.”
“It was a miracle when Jesus rose from the dead and managed to get the tombstone off the entrance.”
“St. Paul cavorted to Christianity. He preached holy acrimony, which is another name for marriage.”
“Christians have only one spouse. This is called monotony.”
These were sooooo funny!